Horror movies are, in so many ways, exactly like children's literature. Full of monsters and fabulous imagery, most are didactic--they warn us of the dangers of premarital sex, drinking, and generally being out late at night. The babysitter narrative usually falls into this category: if you were paid to watch someone's children, for the love of god don't go out drinking. Some horror movies, however, fall into the category of wish fulfillment, and this remake of the standard teen-in-charge tale is one of them. Jill's parents, cruelly, have grounded her with no phone or car and have forced her to babysit for a wealthy couple that lives in a dangerously remote location. It would totally serve them right if she were butchered with no way to escape or call for help. Actually, even better, it would be great if she were *almost* butchered, the only brave soul left standing after an evening of bloodshed. Then they'd see not only their error, but how unbelievably mature she is, even if she went 800 minutes over on her cell phone. The movie tells us immediately that this is a survival narrative; the opening shot of the movie follows her diligent laps around the school's track. This girl is a runner. There's no way a wheezing yokel hunched over a phone is taking her down--if he were in shape he'd spend more time attacking and less time calling from one of the family's luxuriant couches. My only question is if she'll ever actually check the children. [Spoiler: She does. They're fine.] The movie is a pretty standard suspense job, very little slash. For the most part, the movie feels like a medium budget excuse for a really killer set. The mansion is huge and rambling, full of mysterious sounds caused by the usual: ice makers (ominous vapor), pets (a whole room of free range exotic birds...what?!*), shitty postmodern art, and maids (why the babysitter?). There's a great moment where she calls the police only to be told that most of their units are having fun at the party she was forbidden to attend: "sounds pretty wild!" "....yeah." Things go somewhat badly for a while, until Oh Snap! You can dial 911 on disabled cell phones! Take that parents, she's going to talk for like 3 hours. [Photo: she has, at this moment, like 5 phones at her disposal]*Do not keep birds in your home. Only you can prevent bird mites.
1 comment:
I actually think it's a waste of narrative time to establish a character is a runner. It's a assumed that any character in a horror movie is a runner, and watching a lot of it just makes me think, "what is this character trying to hide?" Probably that she's barely a runner.
Actually, that might increase the tension of the film. What's the one where the naked guy has to run from the people hunting him until he gets to the city state? Prefontaine, I think.
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